


Standing Right In Front of You

by mggislife2789



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: F/F, Reader-Insert, Soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 15:36:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11443863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mggislife2789/pseuds/mggislife2789
Summary: Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or their original stories. This is only for fun. It's where my brain goes after the credits roll. No copyright intended. Better safe than sorry. ;)





	Standing Right In Front of You

That’s how she knew.

That moment the light went out and the pressure on her chest turned from heated to icy cold. 

Will was gone.

She was on a flight when it happened, knees buckling from underneath her as she stared down at the necklace, normally a vibrant blue, now a completely snuffed out. JJ practically clawed at the insides of the plane, screaming out as if no one was there to hear. The father of her baby was gone, and she couldn’t even get to him. 

You all tried to console her - to hold her - let her know she wasn’t alone, but that was just it; she felt she was. Her soulmate, the love of her life, was gone. And little Henry would be growing up without a father. 

Days passed and finally it was time for the funeral, everything moving in slow motion as everyone from friends to family to acquaintances offered their condolences. Henry looked on, glancing between his mother and his father’s grave. “When is Daddy coming home?” he whispered. 

JJ sobbed, unable to get the words to come out of her mouth, and in desperation, she had looked to you to explain to Henry where his father had gone. She cried into Morgan’s shoulder as you lifted the little boy on your hip and started speaking through tears. “Has Mommy told you about angels, Henry?”

He nodded. “They are people in the sky that look over us,” he said innocently, a strand of blonde hair falling into his eyes.

You pushed the hair behind his ear and replied. “Yes. Did Mommy tell you how angels get up there?”

“No.” 

This was one of the hardest things, you’d ever done, but you’d do it for JJ. “Angels happen when people pass away. When they pass away, they can’t come back.” You spoke softly, trying to gauge whether or not he understood. “Daddy passed away, sweetheart. He passed away while protecting someone from harm.”

“So,” he started, looking at the grave, “So Daddy can’t come home? He’s in the sky now?”

“Yes, sweetie,” you replied, a tear falling into his hair. You thought he would’ve started bawling, but he didn’t, just a few small tears fell down his cheeks as he looked to the sky.

“I love you, Daddy.”

—-

The moment JJ got home from the funeral, she’d taken her necklace off, the burnt out light too much to bear so shortly after his departure from this world; she couldn’t bear to look at it and be reminded each and every time that Will was never coming home. 

Honestly, you’d been surprised she hadn’t ripped it off at the funeral, but she hadn’t. When you went over after his death to help JJ with Henry, you noticed it sat there on her dresser, barely hidden away from view - much like your own.

After your love had died, you swore you’d never wear it again, so you knew where JJ was coming from. How dare the universe give you someone else. How could that someone ever be your soulmate - that person you loved with all your heart, who you would have gladly given your life for. “Hey, Jayge,” you whispered. She had fallen asleep on the couch next to Henry and since woken up, clutching her little boy in her arms. “Can I help with anything else before I go?” JJ was one of your best friends, so seeing her so distraught and forlorn killed you a little bit inside. You’d cooked dinner for the next couple of days, done dishes and laundry, made beds, anything you could possibly think of so that she could emotionally take care of her son during such a vulnerable time in both of their lives. 

“No, Y/N,” she said softly, carefully getting up off the couch so she didn’t wake Henry. “I can’t thank you enough for all you’ve done for us lately. It goes above and beyond.”

You leaned in and kissed her cheek, pulling her close. “Jayge, you’re my best friend. I’d do anything for you, okay? Call me if you need me.”

—-

As the months went by, JJ seemed to feel better, although her every move was still tinged with grief to some degree. Her parents moved from Pennsylvania to Virginia so that she could continue to do her job and yet not leave Henry with a nanny anymore. Great as the nanny was, she wasn’t JJ or her parents.

While she seemed better, she also seemed a bit more distant. She wasn’t with you or Hotch, but everyone else, she had been pulling away from. When you thought about it, you realized why. Both you and Hotch didn’t wear your necklaces either - all for the same reason, the inability to bear the idea of another soulmate when you only wanted one. 

Over and over again, you’d told her that if she just needed to talk, that you’d be there in a heartbeat, and finally one day, she asked you if you’d go grab a couple of drinks, just the two of you, after work.

“So,” you said, sitting down at the bar, “Unload. I’m here.”

With a soft smile, she leaned her head onto the counter and gently hit it against the dark wood while you waited for your drinks. “I miss him, Y/N. I still miss him.”

“Jayge, it’s barely been a year. Of course you still miss him. If I’m honest with you, I’m sure you’ll always miss him to a degree. I still miss Lou. I always will. And I’m still not ready to move on, but I still do miss…it’s been three years, you know?” You thought about Lou, watching as the color had drained from Lou’s skin little by little until there was nothing left. A tear fell from your eye and from JJ’s as well; she knew how hard it was.

The drinks finally came and over the next couple of hours, you both talked about how scared you were to ever put on your necklaces again. “Henry keeps asking me if I’ll put on the necklace again. He says Daddy would want me to be happy.”

“He’s right,” you smiled. For a five year old, he was way beyond his years. 

“I can’t do it yet,” she said, looking down into her drink. 

“How about this?” you replied. “If you and I end up being ready to put them back on around the same time, we’ll do it together. Cry through it together. Okay?”

She nodded her head and downed the rest of her drink, resting her hand on your arm. It had been a hell of a year, but at least she was somewhat on the mend. As her friend, all you could do was be there to help pick up the pieces.

—-

Rollercoaster was probably an apt word to describe her emotions during the six or so month since you’d had that conversation. Some days were fine, even better than they had been; she’d be smiling and laughing with friends, even the ones she had previously pushed away, and then other days, she’d dissolve into a puddle of tears no matter where she was. 

On one of those days, you’d suggested that just you and her go to the cemetery. She could visit Will and you could visit Lou. She’d agreed and you’d gone to purchase some flowers to leave at their graves. “Are you okay if we go to Lou’s first?” she asked. “I don’t know if I can go to Will’s yet.”

It hadn’t been a problem. Although you still weren’t ready to put on the necklace, you were getting better when you thought about Lou. You sat next to each other, switching places with your heads in each other’s laps until she felt she was ready to go visit Will. At first, she’d been okay, and then eventually she dissolved again. “I miss you, Will.” As you left, she said something that took you off guard. “I’m sorry, Will.”

Why was she sorry?”

—-

For the last year or so, you’d been having this feeling. You weren’t sure what it was, except it was definitely uneasy. What did you want when you put the necklace back on? Did you want it to remain dim? Did you want it to blink, indicating your new soulmate was in your midst, but not actually a part of your life yet? Did you want it to burn brightly? Every option scared you; but JJ said she was ready, as long as you would put yours back on to.

JJ was in the other room, wanting a moment alone as she put on the necklace. That was fine with you, because you were nervous yourself. When you put on the necklace and clasped it around the back, it took a few moments, but it began to flicker; it would stop flickering and remain bright when you were in the presence of your soulmate. “Oh my god,” you cried quietly. “I love you, Lou. But I’m moving on okay?”

As the tears rolled down your cheeks, you turned around, your fingers lightly clasping the heart shape hanging at the hollow of your breasts. “Your necklace looks likes Mommy’s,” Henry whispered. 

JJ had a new soulmate too. “You weren’t supposed to tell me that were you?” you whispered. Henry shook his head back and forth. “Does mommy seem happy or sad?”

“She has tears in her eyes but they look like happy ones,” he replied.

After another few moments, you called to JJ. “You okay, Jayge?”

“Yea,” she called back. “You?”

“I’m good.”

Feeling a heavy, but not all-together unpleasant weight against your chest, you walked out to meet JJ in the living room. The moment you stepped outside, you looked down; the light was burning brightly and was no longer flickering. And then you heard her from across the room. 

“Oh my god,” she breathed. “Y/N?”

The pendant around her neck was shining just as brightly as yours. That’s when it occurred to you - why you’d been so uneasy. You’d been falling for your best friend and hadn’t wanted the pendant to tell you that you were wrong. “Jayge?”

Henry came up between you. “Y/N? Are you mommy’s new soulmate?”

Leaning over, you gave JJ a soft kiss on the lips. “I think I am, sweet pea.”


End file.
